My First Fun Fair In A Decade!

Strangely, there’s a fun fair next to One-Utama this weekend. I didn’t know about it until Calvin asked me if I want to come along and give Liss a surprise!(She doesn’t know that I am back from Kedah).

After months-long hiatus from driving, I still managed to get myself down to the fun fair ….driving alone at 8.45pm..:(

But my direction’s getting really whacked though. From the Subang airport way, I’m supposed to turn into Damansara’s toll but ended up turning into Glenmarie…well, U-turns rock!

No need to further embarrass myself with details on how I almost did not go for the fair.

I did not expect to see a ferris wheel there! I mean I thought it’d be another crappy throw-three-balls-and-win-teddy-bear kinda thing. Those type of games are for old school lovers leh. Too old fashioned liao, but if some people like to romance each other that way, I say, “Go for it.” ..  shit, what am I crapping, 2.20am liao. Damn tired. Anyway, show you somemore pictures!

Yeap,was entertaining myself again with Dad’s camera while waiting for Calvin and his college friends to arrive. My role there was to surprise Liss, so I couldn’t go in yet, just in case I bump into her.

Calvin asked me to creep up behind Liss and cover her eyes with my hands and keep VERY quiet.

asked her to guess who! She couldn’t guess and kept asking me to say something. Cannot tahan liao, HAD to giggle. Wahahahhaha.. Pecah tembelang. She said, I crept up behind her and tried to cover her eyes but nearly poke her nostrils in the process. But anyway, alls well and my hands were over her eyes and she was screaming! LOL! Calvin”JO?!?!”

Ahahahahah.. it was such a fun thing to do. Was happy to see that she was actually happy to see me. 🙂

Got introduced to her college friends and they seem pretty nice as we got along okay.:) It’s always nice to make more friends, no? I do hope that I was not intruding though..after all it’s their outing.


l-r: Calvin, Daryl, Liss, Me,  Andy, Gigi, Sarah and Danial.


l-r: Andy, Gigi(doesn’t she look like Tanya?!) and Dumbo the Elephant.

The first ride we went on was something similiar to the Spinner in Genting Highlands. It would be something the 5 year old me would go and brag to my kindergarten classmates about how cool it is just because I could bring myself to sit on it. It’s not scary but it’s exhilirating.

I was more worried about my miniskirt than anything. STUPID Jolene wears skirt to a fun fair. Anyway, it was fine. I crossed my leg daintily as I got swung around and around and around….

…the seats lifted up and imagine little baby mobiles hanging from a huggee umbrella. It spun around and around and sometimes your swing twists around and the wind catches your hair and your stomach goes up and down, up and down….you just forget what happened in the past four months. If you hate changes and one way to bring you out of the rut you’re in, just hop on to the nearest spinner. It is a very comforting, if not, therapeutic ride.

Next stop! Some-seats-in-a-circle-spinning-and-swinging kinda ride. Not good with names. This was  a little freaky because if you know rides like The Crazy Galleon(a big pirate ship which swings like a GIGANTIC pendulum) then you can imagine how this works. About 24 seats arranged in a circle and the damn seats they spin around and around as the whole thing swings like a bloody pendulum!!


We were screaming non-stop and laughing our hearts out. It was just too fun.

As we were descending, Liss said, “Ei, Adam from 8TV is here.”. Immediately, Kinkybluefairy came into my head.

If some of you managed to see my MSN nickname this afternoon, it read, “Miss Lai, you have just discovered KinkyBlueFairy’s magic. Please indulge yourself.”. I spent the better part of the afternoon reading her blog and enjoyed myself immensely! I mean I’ve seen her around the blogosphere, heck, her blog is so famous she’s practically a celebrity.(Once, Nigel, E-Guy and Kwo Kuang actually talked about her during our yam cha sessions… I never knew they blog hopped..). So yeah, I finally got myself to read her blog and I love it!

And sure enough,KinkyBlueFairy was there. It’s strange, I was more excited that she was there rather than being the typical Malaysian teeny bopper who gets too excited when she sees Adam Carruthers. So can’t I be a fan of both of them??

I went up to her and introduced myself. “Hi Joyce!! I read your blog..I’m Jolene, but I go as Jayelle online…” *waves hand dismissively to indicate that I’m also in the whole blogging thing*

And she was really sweet as she smiled and said, “Hi!! I see… I think I’ve read you as well!” I’m sure she was just being polite(saw it happen alot at blog meets), but nevertheless, I was being such a fan girl. >_< Sheesh.

I asked if I could take a photo with her.

KinkyPugKevin is here as well!” she said.

OH! He is!!

KinkyPugKevin is one of the bloggers that I’ve seen around when I first started to blog hop wayyyy back in middle 2004.

I got introduced to Adam and KinkyPugKevin after that!


l-r: Joyce/KinkyBlueFairy, Me, Adam, KinkyPugKevin.


l-r: Liss, Sarah and Me.


I did not bother to go look see at the other funfair games… so here’s my sole photo of what it looks like.


They even had a Top Gun there! Just like the one in Sunway Lagoon! Didn’t get to try it though.

Another scary pendulum ride. There is an 8 seater kinda carrier on each end of the pendulum thingie which spins according to gravity. So it does involve one being spun upside down. I always have great debates with myself when faced with rollercoasters and the likes. I’m all for the experience……just so..that..I..er..*embarrassed*..can…er..blog..about it. 🙁 I hate to admit it but that’s how I motivate myself to try out everything that is thrown my way….just so I can retell my stories to the world.


Too freaky. The carriage just swings uncertainly..


Get my picture?


See how flimsy it is!


Liss and Daryl preparing for their ride.


I chickened out… see what has become of my coupons due to anxiety and panic.


Everything’s temporary…


..even the toilets were temporary. In trailers, they were.


Liss and I camwhoring! As always.


Another one..


l-r: Sarah, Me, Alvin and Daryl.


Me and Calvin.


l-r: Liss, Sarah and Me.


Never knew I would ever have the chance to take such a cliche photo in my entire life.


Calvin and Sarah.

Last stop, ferris wheel. It went around until we were begging to get off. It got too slow pace for us. That’s the thing with ferris wheel. They never know when to stop.


l-r: Daryl, Liss and Alvin.


I can’t take a photo of all of us, so you just gotta be satisfied with em thighs.


Calvin and Sarah again! With a lovely background, no doubt about that.


A spectacular view of our second ride! That pendulum one.


Sarah and I camwhoring in the carriage.


The structure of the ferris wheel… haiyah, just deal with it lah. It’s me and my nonsensical photo-takings.

A lovely view of part of the fair. It was almost closing time, so the lights are few.

We left the place at 12am and I drove back to Subang at full speed. Wound down the windows so I can feel the excitement an Ah Beng feels when he does that. I was short of a ciggarette to hold to complete the whole picture. The cars zoomed by and it got too scary so I wound the windows up again.

I thought I was IT because I was going at 130km/h(yea, yea, so what) along the Federal Highway on the middle lane.

Fuckanathan…the turning into Subang flashed past me.

I was heading into Shah Alam at 12.15am!! ARGHHHHHHHH..

At least I know I am a woman with mistakes like these. Women drivers. 🙂

Walk Somemore Bad Soul

I should’ve taken it as an omen indicating further misfortunes when I put my luggage bag upright and everything fell out when the taxi was waiting. …

…anatomy books, mini skirts, hair dryer, cosmetics, A4 papers, notes, t-shirts, panties, bras all over the ground.

Perhaps it’s wise to zip the luggage bag everytime hor?

Before I go into why my trip back home sucked, at least there was a moment somewhere in Perak when I roused from my slumber(wtf, not slumber, more like crouched-position pressing against my spinal nerves hence rendering me unconcious. OK JOLENE ENOUGH ANATOMY.) and I found myself staring out into a valley of yellow stars, semi-obscured by a curtain of mist. So beautiful! The highway cuts through some hills and there was mist everywhere and there’s a valley below with a town situated in it. As you know, hills, they have contours and all. The highway tilts but what I saw was the town tilting..you know, like when you’re on a plane and suddenly the land tilts to the left, up, down, right..etc.

Another notable incident on the bus was when there was a baby crying her lungs out. Her mother would shout at her and you would hear something muffling the baby’s cries. Then you’ll hear the outbreak of another wail before it gets muffled and blends with the racket from the bus engine. We suspected child abuse. The climax was when the mother put her semi naked baby girl in the aisle and changed her diaper. Like performing a magic show for the other passengers like that. I was waiting for the smell of baby shit to hit my nose but ….very strange.. the more I inhaled, I picked up the scent of KFC somewhere in the bus. *stomach growls longingly*. This cannot be as disgusting as compared to the time Maxis said that the cadaver’s spinal cord reminded him of mihun soup.

Somewhere in Perak, the bus stopped at a run down eatery and there was a burger stall outside the eatery. There was a pile of what-was-to-be/what-would-have-been steamed peanuts.

Hungry, I asked the man, “Saya nak beli 200g, bang.”

He replied, “Tak panas punya, sejuk.”

“Oh, ye ke? Tak apalah, saya nak jugak,” I replied, growing hungrier.

“Tak sejuk lah,” he grew impatient.

“Tak apa, saya nak jugak,” I just wanted some damn peanuts, damnit!

“Kamu ada tangan kan? Kamu pegang lah!!” the fucker was so fucking bitchy.

I was taken aback. “SUDAH. SAYA TAK MAU BELI LAH!” and I stormed off.

I turned back and spoke to Lishen and Lie Yuen (who were waiting for their burgers) in cantonese, “Don’t buy from the asshole! Let’s go!”

The two girls walked off, leaving Yan Rui(who was standing with them) at the stall and he kena-ed from the burger man because he was the only one left there to bully after we walked off.

Anyway, please lah,got business also don’t want to do. I just want to eat peanuts, don’t care whether hot, warm or cold right? I give you money, you take. Don’t talk so much! Somemore he should take an ear digger and dig his ears nicely because clearly, he has problems with his hearing.

*

KL rained cats and dogs yesterday as we crawled into the city. At midnight, the bus stopped and the driver started puffing on a cigarette in the enclosed bus.

I told Cze-Yin(who was sitting next to me), “Let’s start coughing!”

“AHACCKKK, KE, Ke, AHAAACCKKKGGHH, AHHHUUHHGGHHKK..*choke,choke*”..

No response.

“Turun lah!” the bus driver called out after awhile.

We were stumped. Isn’t our destination supposed to be Puduraya? My poor father has been waiting there for over an hour. The bus driver said that JPJ’s not allowing anymore out of town bus into Puduraya due to the massive jams. All buses were to stop at Jalan Duta’s Hockey Stadium instead. Lagi lagi JPJ yang suei.

Allow me to curse like a true urbanite: NYA MAHAI CHAU CHIPET FUCKING BUS FUCK FUCK DONKEY DRAGON PIG GOOSE BABI ANJING BETINA PUKI MELELEH PUNYA.

We got out on the main road and we took our bags out from the luggage compartment. I think I carried like 20-30kgs worth of junk with me. In the pouring rain. Maxis’ schoolbag fell on a puddle of water and he immediately opened it to retrieve his notes…but it was too late. The sadness on his face was indescribable as he peeled his notes apart to survey the damage.

I was frantically calling and smsing my other friends and my dad as well(who was talking to me very sweetly before shit happened, and became damn damn damn grumpy when the whole fiasco happened). Raindrops dotted my handphone screen and words were magnified and distorted and I could see individual colour pixels…

I then had to pull my 20-30kg luggage up a small hill to the stadium. My back was threatening to split in half.

My jeans were rolled up to my knees and my hair was in a chicken-rice-seller-hairstyle(messy bun). I felt the rainwater from the puddles seep into my cheapo velvet flats.

Very unhappy.

Dad was quite heaty on the phone because he didn’t know which entrance to wait for me and both of us have never even heard of this place.

I walked to all possible entrances in the pouring rain, totting my backpack. After some trial and error, I finally saw my dad’s car. Not good, it was nearly 1am.

I will use aeroplanes for major holidays next time. I HATE BUSES. SO TOTALLY UNRELIABLE. At least you don’t expect Air Asia to drop you at Bukit Jalil or something just because “KLIA is having a traffic jam leh,”.

I still can’t scrub away the stains left from my soggy cheapo velvet flats on my feet.

🙁

Walk Bad Soul

I can’t stop doing these literal cantonese translations. Walk Bad Soul, Hang Sui Wan means bad luck throughout the day.

Anyway, yeah.

I followed Lie Yuen to university today because it is the only place that I can do the things that I need to do online.

But as always, if it involves blogging, I will take ages and Lie Yuen was being too patient with me(through gritted teeth, hehe) so I asked her to go home first. Thought I’d fork out RM10 for a taxi ride home since what I needed to do online had to be done immediately.

At 1pm, I have not eaten anything the entire day. My stomach sang to me.

I got pissed off at the computer in the uni because they were s..o……..s……..l….o…….w……………. I waited for 15 minutes and they didn’t even load. Pissed, I took my things and went off to the Anatomy Dissection Hall and whatdya know, the two computers were taken up as well. I was glaring at the girl Friendstering away and nearly fall asleep, but couldn’t because the formalin was too strong what with the hall being used by a bunch of medic students studying a disembodied limb.

I was bored to my skull and wanted to go home. I called the taxi driver that was especially hired by the university and after waiting for him for 15 minutes, I got pissed and said that I was in a hurry and that I have someone else to fetch me home. Rm10 was also too painful to part with.

I then called 103, to get a Sg. Petani cab taxi service.

I ended up fighting with the Malay cabbie on the phone because he wanted to charge me RM15.

“Mana boleh moi, RM10 tak boleh lah moi, kita tak payah makan punya ar?”

“Haiyo, Hari Raya sudah datang, boleh makan lor!”

“Adoh, itu Amanjaya di mana? Dekat Strand Hospital? RM15 laaaaa..” 

“Tak mau. RM10.”

“Mana boleh moi…. haiyoh, berapa you nak?”

“Rm8. Wahaha, cakap je. Rm10 la.”

“Tak boleh lah moi,”

“SUDAHLAH . Tak nak lagi. Mahal sangat. *hangs up*”

Crazy fella, doesn’t he know that I’m saving up for a 5.0 megapixels camera? hmph. Pity this child wei.;(

I was so bored that I actually opened my slides to study and fell asleep after 5 minutes before being deliriously happy when I remembered that I have some chinese shows downloaded into my hard disk from Lishen’s external hard drive.

But in an un-chinese and studious community on a rainy day, where can I go that is quiet enough for me to listen to the dialogues and lonely enough for me not to disturb people who are studying?

I then sat in a stairwell and watched my chinese show. So many people walked past and looked at me. I hope I didn’t look like I was watching porn in a discreet manner. A lecturer even walked past and asked, “You alright, girl?”  “Yes, Sir! Just watching my chinese shows..”

Pai Seh..

So to save money, I took the 5pm bus, which meant that I didn’t get the chance to sweep, mop, pack bags, wash clothes, dry clothes, study aortic arches..all the things that I promised myself to do since there were no classes on Thursday.

Just as we were turning into the main road, a JPJ van stopped our bus. The JPJ climbed up the bus and said, “Ini bas untuk budak sekolah punya la”. The bus driver had to go to the back and settle things with the JPJ officer. Desmond(a classmate of mine) tried to take photos of the JPJ receiving bribe(but that didn’t happen). The saman was RM600!! What the fuck.. since when a Bas Sekolah was not allowed to fetch anybody else other than school children? If that’s the case, why would the university(Samy Vellu’s university somemore) hire such a bus? Besides, I’ve seen Taylor’s College having the same yellow school bus yet nothing happens!

Then suddenly comes along this stupid bunch of JPJ officers, oh, and very near Hari Raya too. I don’t see them stopping us anytime months before Hari Raya! I mean we’ve sat on this bus from Day One and I’m sure the bus has been used for many many times… and so what, the other days these JPJ officers must be slacking lah?!

EVEN IF IT’S A RULE, WHAT DOES IT SAY ABOUT THE OTHER DAYS WHEN THE BUS WAS ALLOWED TO ROAM FREE? HUH HUH HUH??

Lydia(a pharmacy student) joked, “Then later they’ll ask us for our ICs. God, i hope not! I didn’t bring mine.”

Then one of the officers came up on the bus and said, “ahh.. boleh tolong tunjuk IC?”

….shit..

Luckily I brought mine, and truth be told, don’t know why so itchy go and show. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had the chance to “Tunjuk IC” since I got mine 6 years ago. Then the officer took down my particulars and the girl who was next to me on the bus narrowed her eyes disapprovingly mouthing, “Shouldn’t show him!!”… and I was like, “Huh?? How I know?!” I asked him, “Er, Encik, untuk apa ye?” and he answered, “Rekod lah.”. I pestered somemore, “Rekod apa?”

He replied nonchalantly again, “Rekod lah! Adalah!”

I was not satisfied, “Tahulah, rekod untuk ape?”

He chuckled and said, “rekod untuk raya!”

Someone said, “Nak jemput kita untuk kenduri raya ke?”

He said, “yalah, rekod untuk raya.”

What the hell.. want to take down our particulars also tell us lah what happened right?! Don’t be so fucking mysterious about it and act all cutesey. YOU ARE A DAMN OFFICER AND YOU SHOULD SERVE YOUR FELLOW CIVILIANS WELL DAMNIT. ANSWER THEM PROPERLY WHEN THEY ASK YOU QUESTIONS.

I don’t think I am comfortable having my particulars with some officers… what if something happens to the bus driver and we’re called back for witness? Gosh. I’m just not comfortable with it.

I called my father repititively but he didn’t answer. So I continued asking the officer why why why and he didn’t answer me. CHIBAI betul!

My father called back and said I should complain to the university. So yeah, I’ll do just that. 🙁

Really bad luck.

Where’re my damn pamelo leaves? *Mandi air bali*

Weird Dream (Starring Grandparents, Lilian Chan, Liss etc.)

It’s been quite awhile since I’ve had weird dreams. In this dream, my dad allowed me to drive the Camry back from Kedah, which should be quite impossible because it is his company’s car. The de-mister(is it those line line things lining the backscreen of the car) was on fire and smoke was filling up the car. I sprayed water on it to put it off.

Suddenly, I found myself outside a hotel/club house. I’m not sure which one it is but it has been around for quite awhile. My motive was to interview this famous clown. So famous that the clown was almost celebrity. I had big bouquets of flowers and balloons in my hands but ended up forgetting about the balloons and when I came back for them, it was without air. I had to wait till nearly midnight before that famous clown could come out to meet me. When the clown came out, we acted very weirdly towards each other. Sort of clumsy. sort of shy. The clown’s name was Daisy.

Suddenly, the clown is actually Lilian Chan, who is doing her part for charity. Sort of like a Patch Adams kind of concept. We chatted for awhile and I didn’t get to ask any clown-interview-esque type of questions but ended up telling her how old I really am.

Then I drove the car back and my dad asked me why I was so late. I told him that I went to my friend’s house to play Dota. (Wtf?)

I went downstairs and a few of my family members were congregating there. My cousins, my godmother/aunty susie, grandfather’s cousin sister and a few more. My staircase was transformed into a mural of family portraits and amidst the family portraits, was a photo of my grandparents’ ash-storage-place at the crematorium. My grandfather’s cousin sister saw the photo and broke down. Then suddenly I turned around to look at my godmother and she transformed into my grandmother. My grandmother and all of us were crying and hugging each other and she asked us to take care and be good. Then she asked me to paint my godmother’s nails for her. Very strange, because in real life, my godmother is always asking me to paint her nails for special occasions. After that, my grandmother transformed back into my godmother.

The next day, in the Seventeen magazine, a big photo of Lilian Chan and her clown-act stint appeared amidst the pages. She mentioned about me interviewing her. Her birthdate was written extra ordinarily big and next to it, there was a big thought bubble that said, “Guess how old is Jolene? The girl who interviewed her? The first to guess it will win a prize!”

The next thing I knew, I was driving out of a shopping mall with Liss and then I saw my entire family waving at me from the main entrance just as I was descending the parking lot curly-wurly slope(think like the one in One-utama’s old wing.). I got out of the car and was so excited to see them. Suddenly we found ourselves in a back alley and we were there as an entourage. A few of my relatives were squatting near the drains in a long line and there was a white van(the type florists use). In the front seat, out stepped both my grandparents. We knew that they were dead but there was no hoo-hah about it. We congregated in that alley to conduct some last rites for them. They were like their usual self, nagging us about our punctuality and .. I don’t know, acting their typical selves. The strange thing was not that it did not feel strange to us at all.

The immediate family members were given strange costumes to where. I had to change in front of the relatives and I wasn’t wearing a bra .. and I don’t know if they saw anything. But the pants they gave us to wear were horrifying. It’s like those that babies wear, with a flap on the bum? Yeap, there’s a hole, no flap. So my bum was for all to see.

After we performed the rites, my grandparents disappeared.

Then I woke up and my housemates have already left for dinner. It was maggi mee again for me.