Clicking With Girls Is Difficult To Do

Sometimes it is so difficult to be friends with girls.

Don’t you notice the barrier? With guys, friendships are so much easier to build. More jokes can be cracked. More things can be said. Or maybe that is flirting?

Girls take far more time to warm up to each other and most cliques were formed in secondary school, taking an average of about 5 years. Not all girls are fun to click with. Some of them cannot give you the reactions that you are used to, and sometimes you cannot give them the reaction that they are used to. Now that is a problem with wavelength. If you’re not on the same frequency, it’s downhill from there I’m telling you.

First it starts off with the over polite replies..”Really?!! Wow… Issit? Ohhh!! I see i see..and then..?! Ohhh..ooohhh!!! Ooooooo..so funny!! heeehee!”

Then it dwindles off to the polite smiles…*thin lipped grin and slow nods of the head with eyes wide open to show “excitement”*

After awhile, the things they do tend to get on you. Then that’s when the gossip starts. Bitching and backstabbing, inevitable.

But don’t think that it stops there. Girls are like walking emotions detectors. If someone is being remotely cold to her, she can sense it. First she gets just a LIL bit upset about the sudden coldness…then she finds fault to get angry at the OTHER girl.

Now we have moved on to the evil glare. The two girls have stopped talking to each other. Extreme cases involves nudging and pushing(I have been guilty of it… back in form2, there was this girl who rolled her eyes at me and I pushed her and said, “You think you damn great la now?”..my goodness, I’m such a bully.). The more daring the girls get, the more bitch comments you can hear being thrown back and forth. Just yesterday, Vinnie and I accidentally grabbed the same piece of notes from the stack of photostated notes. After a slight game of tug of war, I won (pulled really hard) and she gave the extremely spiteful JELINGAN MATA.(the motion of closing your eyes for a second or two before sweeping your glance sideways with anger-filled eyes…..a technique all girls have mastered since kindergarten. No shit.)

But those are extreme cases of soured friendships between girls lah.

It is usually problems with differences in wavelength. The more civilized girls usually don’t really indulge in conversation with each other on a regular basis. Only when you bump into each other do you force yourself to make small talk. This is when the over polite replies and over polite smiles come to picture.

What about the over friendly girls? I have been told that I am too friendly sometimes but I don’t think so. I am just good at making small talk and sounding interestingly interested when I meet people for the first time like throwing in questions about themselves.

There have been more extreme cases than me. Some girls have to know their limits. We’re not that close yet, do NOT invade my personal bubble. A few months back, there was this girl who would link arms with me and then stroke my hair. I’ve barely spoken more than 10 sentences with her before. Not acts of lesbianism lah, don’t worry. Just all this touchy-feely things that most girls enjoy. Heck, even with my childhood friends(my multicontinental(is there such a word?) dahlings who are all over the world) and I link arms only when we are extremely high or when we need a hug or two after a bad day. Different cultures I suppose. Especially if those girls are not clickable, arms linking and hair stroking will only make me feel like bashing you in the face. Then there are those girls who speak to you like they are trying to seduce you. LIKE HELLO!! TUNE BACK YOUR FREQUENCY! YOU’RE TALKING TO A GIRL NOW..NOT A GUY!

This reminds me of a girl in national service. You know la all of us get so sweaty at the end of the day. She was already annoying in her own right, very irresponsible, always hungry hence acting damn kesian by staring hungrily or licking her lips resulting in us offering her our biscuits and she had a couple of teeth missing to add to the overall picture. After a long sweaty day, the girls would hang in the dorm and start gossiping about the other girls in the other dorms… and then she will WANT to know what we’re talking about(she usually gets left out..kesian)..she would nudge and say, “ehhhh apa you all cakap?” at the same time taking her index fingers to exert force on your forearm while dragging it down so that it flicks off at the side. THAT IS POSSIBLE BECAUSE OF OUR SWEATY FOREARMS AND HER STICKY FINGERS. EW EW EW EW.

To click well, girls have to:-

1) have the same sense of humour.
2) despise the same people.
3) adore the same type of guys. (it’s nice to bond over a good gushing-over-cute-guys session) But this can backfire as well when the girls fall in love with the same guy. But that’s another story for another day. 😀
4) the same interests. (ie. nail arts, blogs, tv shows, sticker collecting(abit risky…too childish a hobby to build a good friendship over), dogs, same perversive minds etc.)
5) have similiar attitude (ie. Loud girls HATE quiet girls and vice versa)

Here’s an interesting revelation:

We’ve all come across girls who have crushed on the same guy. It is more complicated when the girls are already great friends to begin with. Fortunately for me, I’ve only been involved in only ONE similiar case and it wasn’t even that big a deal, so no problems. But there are girls who were already not on the same wavelength having a crush on the same guy. Now that’s when the extreme bitchfest starts.

I have been guilty of farting in the face of one such person due to my extreme jealousy wayyyy back in secondary school.(She was standing behind me on the staircase).

But I have gotten my fair share of bitch-bullies as well. Back in form1, these few girls will nudge and push me and say, “Bitch. He damn bad taste etc etc.”. or scream at me from two blocks away, “(name of guy) GOT DAMN BAD TASTE. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!”. Luckily I’m not so stunningly beautiful to receive this kind of treatment year after year.

But girls will find every possible reason to launch a full on I-hate-you-you-hate-me campaign when they discover that they have a (current)boy in common. It’s quite fun to release the tension that way. But you kind of grow out of it. Or maybe you don’t? I’ll need some input from those with ex boyfriends who have new girlfriends. Fortunately, I have not experienced that kind of scenarios. 🙂 Even if you don’t like the boy anymore, the hatred for the girl still lingers on. It becomes a habit more or less.

Guys are easier to befriend. The noisier ones can be handled by trying to outdo their crappings and then you come out the winner(after managing to shut him up), and everybody has fun.
The quieter ones, you just try to tease him until he blushes, you come out the winner, and everybody has fun.

Not same with girls leh. The noisiest one will scare you into submission. The quiet ones will annoy you with the shy nods and silence.

But when you do find a girl whom you can click with, it’s SO much more fun then a semi cute flirt-worthy new guy friend.

Strange Dreams Again and Again

It’s weird how my dreams always give the same deluded effect.

My grandfather had a few of us over for a dinner at his house. Some how, the people who were there were familiar, but they were not family. The only family member who was there with me was my father. I don’t usually take my camera to family gatherings. But I kept asking my father to help me take pictures of me with my grandfather.

We stood side by side to each other in silence while posing awkwardly for many photographs.

Then I sat down and asked my grandfather about a story of him when he was a boy. He told me how he found a coke bottle and did a school project with it. But as I listened to the story, I kept crying and crying and crying. It was like I knew that he would leave me soon.

Sometime later, he passed away and I felt somewhat satisfied that I’ve managed to at least take many photos with him before he died.

Then I woke up from my dream.

The first thought in my head was, “Ohmigod, that was so sad. I should visit my grandfather more often.”
Then I will gain a little more conciousness, “Wait, he died so many months ago.”

This is not the first time such thoughts came to me right after a dream about my grandparents. It’s like I have temporary amnesia right after my dreams.

I don’t think I’ve blogged this, but once, I even dreamt that Chee Kiang’s grandmother had the same face as my grandmother. This was before I met his grandmother.

In the dream, his grandmother was apparently from Penang too(one of his grandmother is from Penang, but I was dreaming about his paternal grandmother who was from Perak) and that there was a very high chance that she could be my grandmother’s long lost twin sister. (In my dream, I was horrified to find out that I was Chee Kiang’s cousin. Haha)

I remember sitting on his couch and peering at his grandmother’s face and holding it in my hands. His grandmother who looked exactly like MY grandmother had this very innocent and sad and lost and naive look on her face.

My OWN grandmother is anything but innocent and naive. So it was weird to see her looking like a little girl. The expression I mean.

Same thing, I woke up from the dream, feeling guilty about not visiting my grandmother at their house in USJ3. Then I remembered.
However, I’ve also had dreams where I’d see them and KNOW that I’m dreaming and that they were dead.

I was at one of the stops along the North South Highway. There are some other parts of the dream that consisted of strangers, some children asking me to buy things, and a little boy asking me to hold his keys, some adults wanting the key from me, and the little boy making me wait for a little too long.

But that’s not the point, the point was that I came upon this gazebo. I saw my form3 Living Skills teacher sitting amidst a crowd of Indian diners. No biggie, I’ll probably go say hi later, I thought. I turned to my right and I was surprised to see my family there. I mean, why would they be somewhere along the North South Highway?

My Uncle Terry and Aunty Judy were back from the UK and were dining with my family too.

I went up to the table and stood at one end. Clockwise from my left sat: My father, my mother, my uncle terry, my aunty judy, MY FATHER AGAIN, MY MOTHER AGAIN, and oh god.. my deceased grandparents. This time in the dream I knew that they’ve passed away and did not make conversations because I was freaked out.

But I think the freakier bit of my dream was to see repetitions of my parents. I mean, TWO sets of them on the same table?

I excused myself and my Uncle Terry asked me where I was going. I said, “I gotta go to school.”

Weird…….. I had this dream when I was on the bus back from Kedah.

What have I been eating recently???
🙁

Psychic MSN Conversation & Boys’ Rooms


Taken at the Masjid Jamek LRT station right after the heavy downpour

*

Sometimes I get mind numbing conversations on MSN from people who have randomly added me from my blog(I block those who tell me they got my email address of the “internet”. Funnily, they are all middle eastern folks who add me. And the first thing they want to do is “Play webcam”). Admittedly this girl who chatted with me added me a long time ago because she wanted to do a survey on national service.

I’m not entirely enticed at the prospect of talking to people who I meet through the internet(without any mutual friends or interests to bridge the connection). I will reply monosyllabically. But I’ve brought my responses to mind numbing conversations to a whole new level!

Let’s call this girl E. E, first and foremost, I’d like to apologize for making fun of our MSN conversation. But it’s just too funny. LOL.

E: your brother followed you back to Kedah?
Miss Lai: Nolah, I only came back for the weekend.
E: Oooh..is his name Jason Lai?

At this point, I was quite bored. So I said…

Miss Lai: eh, how you know?
E: Is he the one who conducted in the MPO?

0_0 This is getting weird..

Miss Lai:yesyes! That’s the guy!
E: Okay, I saw him then just now.
Miss Lai: tell him his sister said hi..
E: Erm, just now afternoon leh. Now evening already.
Miss Lai: icicic.
E: Uhhuh, uhhuh. What work is he doing anyway? Zoo keeper?

Wtf?!! How random is this? So I thought fine lah, the weirder the conversation, the funnier it gets.

Miss Lai: Yea…..zoo keeper.
E: Really?
Miss Lai: Yes.
E: Then how come he conducts in MPO?
Miss Lai: Because he likes music too.
E: Zoo keeper where? Malaysia?
Miss Lai: Nah, Switzerland.
E: u mean he came all the way to Malaysia just to conduct this MPO..? Wow..
Miss Lai: Yeah…passionate huh.
E: Uhhuh. He studies music too?
Miss Lai: Yeahh..
E: and animals too.

!! What?!

Miss Lai: Yea….amazing huh.
E: Uhhuh, Passionate to the animals or the MPO?
Miss Lai: He is aiming to make an All Animals Orchestra. AAO.
E: In Switzerland?
Miss Lai: No, in Zimbabwe
.

I can’t believe she still believes me.

E: Haha, what animals will there be?
Miss Lai: You know, the type which make sounds.
E: You mean every kind lah.
Miss Lai: Yeah, but sometimes rabbits are a little quiet. So not every kind.
E: When is this AAO thing?
Miss Lai: Should be held on the 30th of February 2010.
E: my mum said all the animals that he is training now will be dead by then man, so long more.
Miss Lai: lol…well you don’t know. Only the longer surviving ones are selected to play for the orchestra.
E: Oh..so are you going to go see it?
Miss Lai: It should be fun. I mean how often do you get to see a donkey singing in
               falsetto rite?
E: Does the donkey really sings or it brays?
Miss Lai: Train it to give out different amplitudes of brays lor!

Whatever bray is. -_-

E: It would be fun seeing them bringing out wrong tunes. Haha.
Miss Lai: No, they have four years to train. nothing should go wrong. You don’t have faith in Jason?
E: got lah, that one definite. But you won’t know what will happen suddenly right.
Miss Lai: Yup…
E: so you only have one sibling..? a brother?
Miss Lai: Yeap…..
E: Okay.

And that was the end of our conversation. I’ve never had so much fun crapping.

Intrigued, I googled Jason Lai MPO. And nearly shat my pants laughing.

*

Sett was kind enough to fetch Jimmy, Ken(one of the pharmacy dudes over here who also happens to be the guys’ housemate) and I to the bus stop for the weekend trip back to KL.

Sett had to take a bath (ooh-er, sorry girls, no photos) so we chilled at the boys’ three leveled floors for awhile.

I had to go around with my camera. 🙂 Let you have a peek at the living conditions of my guy classmates’.

l-r: Ee Chean and Ken’s room.


Maxis on his bed. He shares a room with Ah Thong.


Chwan Horng’s room.


Ah Thong in his room with his prized possession.


Jimmy trying to impress me. Tak jadi lah dei. And the funniest thing about him is that his mattress is a blow-up one. LOL. And it’s so cute that he puts a bed sheet on it. LOL!!


The winner of the Best Room Award goes to Sett. So classy wei. Like so Japanese Zen-ish. GOT PLANT ON THE TABLE SOMEMORE..#$#$(#*$^#. The only plant I have in my room is the fungus on the ceiling. But really, his room is situated on the highest floor, and the breeze is just fantastic. Imagine his black curtains flapping in the wind as he studies Anatomy.


They even have the right mind to put a cardboard beneath the shoes! PASS!!


Normal lah…………………………


The resident vegetarian belanjas everybody some papaya.


Maxis does not believe in forks.


Thanks Maxis!


While waiting for the rest to get ready, I was bored. So I took out my eyeshadows and had fun making Maxis’s thigh look pretty.

Surprisingly, this time around, the bus ride was GOOD. AND FAST. Within 5 hours, I was in KL already. Yi Lin, this time no backside pimple leh!:)

I sat in between Jimmy and Ken in the bus. The benefits of being a woman. Ahh. Ken was showing me photos that the boys took while cleaning the house. And the mad things they got up to. You know they actually “WORK OUT” by climbing the OUTSIDE of the house from the ground floor to the second floor? crazy!!!


Some smart alec figured that the floor was slippery enough to play human bowling.


Yay. Goal.


Oh wow, sliding dentists.


LOL. Dental orgy.


This is the funniest picture!! LOL!! They are really sliding on the floor! Apparently one of them figured out that it hurts less to propel themselves by springing away from the wall..as compared to doing a running jump and then falling to the ground in hopes of sliding for quite a distance.

Boys.


What? Got play commando also??!


LOL! Head pain already!


One of the running jumps’ demonstrators.

Hope you guys clicked on the video at the top of the entry:) Was quite nice to see the rushing water. The water level was DAMN high. An old uncle stood next to me and looked out to the river as well. He asked me, “Can you swim?” “Yes, I can,” I replied. “I can’t.” he smiled. The both of us agreed that the river looks so beautiful with the rushing water.

It’s nice to take a breather from the evening rush hour to observe things like that eh? 


Outside Masjid Jamek, while crossing the road. I know my dad will kill me if he knows what I did.


Wet wet wet..

I came back for the weekend because I had relatives who came back from the States. 😐 Haven’t seen them in 10 years. But I guess, it doesn’t really matter after you’ve not seen each other for 10 years. What’s another 10 more years? So I came back for “me time” mostly, since the boyfriend was in Kota Kinabalu with his father. Sigh.

But I did manage to catch up with (Divine)Dennis, MunTeng, Joshua, She Dee, Jiun Jeh(apparently VERY popular in NUS now), Wai Kit, Vern Yang and OMIGOD DENNIS TAN.<– haven’t seen this dude since…secondary school.

I asked Joshua, “So, any women in your life now?”
Joshua retorted, “What woman woman all.. still young okay!!”
“Old already lah. Faster tell. How many women adi?”
“Girl lah..GIRL.”

Since Joshua is still single……Watch out for him in a future pimptress post! Yea! Thanks to Wai Kit for suggesting a very appropriate name for him: “Jumping Joshua.”
Dennis promises to send me some photos of Josh. He says he’ll try to get some which shows Joshua slightly elevated from the ground.

-_-. Don’t think Divine Dennis gets my Pimptress role….girls don’t CARE if he can jump. They just want to know what desirable qualities he has. Right girls?


Cute photo of my Dad, Cousin Derek and Mervyn sleeping in the living room. That’s Angel running.


Angel sees me taking a photo. And so does my father.


Angel ignores my dad’s attempts to play with her.


I miss Mervyn. Actually, only to pose for the photo. Don’t really miss him. 😀 hehehe.


Let’s play Fart On The Brother.


We have a love-hate relationship.

Peas

“…. I told you, I DON’T KNOW WHERE THE PEA IS!!!” Jolene screamed. The girl blinked away tears from her already small eyes made puffy by the accumulation of tears. The Yeast Master released Jolene from her firm grip and threw her to the ground. Jolene looked up at the Yeast Master and winced when she tasted the metallic tang of blood. She cut her lips on the ground.

I cannot let the location of the Pea be known. It must be protected. The mystery must go on.

The Yeast Master was an aging lady with a scarf wrapped tightly around her hair. Her skin was yellow and her eyes were sullen from the decades of searching for that one thing that most men have trouble searching for. Her rags screamed her ignorance for the material world of today for her only purpose on this Earth is one.

The Yeast Master shivers at the memory from her distant past. She vaguely remembers a hand. A sensation. THE PEA.

“You must believe me.” Jolene choked as tears streamed down and mixed with the blood on her lips.

The Yeast Master still looks as if she is lost in a reverie. Smiling faintly at something that once pleased her. Her body swayed side to side and her frequency intensified as she swayed more and more.

Sensing an opportunity, Jolene crawled towards the door at the end of the room. The Yeast Master was not a foolish woman and easily strode over to Jolene and pulled her by the hair. The poor girl struggled and cried as the evil Yeast Master dragged her to the other side of the room and flung her against the wall. The back of her head made contact with the concrete wall with a deafening crack.

Despite the throbbing sensation at the back of her head, Jolene spat, “What do you want the pea for? You’re nothing but a dried up old cunt. YOU DON’T NEED IT. IT WON’T FUNCTION ON YOU ANYMORE. HAHAHAHAHAHA” Jolene laughed maniacally.

Outraged, the Yeast Master grabbed the bleeding girl by her hair once more and flung her out the open window, onto the streets outside. A sickening thud was heard and a chorus of frantic screams ensued.

*

Somewhere far away, a woman’s moans cut through the silence of the night.

That’s the sound. Someone else KNOWS where the pea is. I must find that someone.

The Yeast Master followed the sounds. With every step she took, the moans became more audible. Soon her pace built up in rhythm with the cries of the disembodied voice.

She came upon an abandoned shack and the Yeast Master was very sure that this is the place.

*

“You know where the pea is. Tell me where the pea is.” The Yeast Master demanded of the woman.

The woman was sitting at the side of a bed and had her back turned to the Yeast Master. She turned around slowly to see who had intruded her privacy. The moonlight illuminated the glistening sweat on the woman’s brows and her hair plastered to the sides of her face. Her white night gown glowed even more under the moonlight. The woman turned her head a little more to make out the identity of the stranger. In the darkness, the Yeast Master could see that the woman had a glazed over look in her eyes.

It’s not time to ask her questions. It’s too soon.

The girl started speaking.

“Like the onset of a waterfall,
Hidden deep in the cave of greatest desires,
A passage where rose petals flow,
For just awhile under the Luna’s glow.”

The girl repeated it again and again. Each repetition sounding more and more like a chant.

The Yeast Master cut through her chants, “Where. is. The. pea?”

The girl’s eyes danced with laughter and continued her chants.

The Yeast Master’s tempers were flaring again and she lifted a hand, ready to strike the poor girl across the face. The girl stood up and grabbed her hand.

Without breaking eye contact, the girl directed the Yeast Master’s hand somewhere else.

“Oh..” the Yeast Master murmured.

But Jolene has been right all along. It no longer functioned for the old lady.

The Yeast Master murdered an innocent girl’s life over something so obvious. Something so…present. Something…already…belonging to the Yeast Master herself.

****

LOL. Too much of Da Vinci Code. A pathetic attempt, but an attempt to contribute none the less.

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